Create One Pink Flower

It's been pretty quiet here. The quietness is in contrast to the ruckuses spinning in my head and the overflowing life within my home and family. 

I multitask like a crazy in my head.  I drive like a thoroughbred between our lake cities. And my mission field in our little home communities has prompted me to seek training in the area of spiritual direction.

I've got so much I want to do, so much I want to research, so many plans to implement, so many pieces I want to write.

The ruckus silences me.

And I've been pretty OK with that because I know that God opens all avenues when he desires us to proceed.

Still I see others continuing their projects while mission in and serving harder and wider than I judge myself too harshly. I've lost readers because of my silence.

But the world is so loud that I figure it isn't missing my little bit.

Then today God reminds me of something.

(Last two paragraphs: "A Healing Walk with St. Ignatius" by Lyn Holley Doucet)

I fight this daily...weekly...monthly. So many voices out there. They silence me. Then God tells me that He was not content with "creating one pink flower; he created thousands."

I'm one of the thousands of voices out there. And I'm very small.

But I like small.

Yet I am called.

And I must respond.

It's a struggle I have with myself and it's not about me. The silence is about me and I need to break through the silence because it should never be about me. That's a sign that pride is trying to stifle the voice of God.

But the voice doesn't have to be here on this blog and it doesn't have to be every season.

I need only create one pink flower when called by God to do so and then allow God to plant it where he pleases.